Reality

Isn't reality a funny thing? We are masters at creating certain expectations in our minds of how something should or would be. Those of us who are married understand this the moment our honeymoon is over. Don't get me wrong, I love marriage and I am married to the world's most amazing man. He may be reading this. =) However, there came a time when I began to realize that marriage didn't even being to resemble a fairytale, Happily-Ever-After experience. Whoa! You mean there really is work involved? He snores? He really shouldn't eat bean burritos anytime after 4pm. And more importantly, he should just know how I'm feeling, what I need, I shouldn't have to explain everything to him...right?

Reality hits hard sometimes. How about when your first baby arrives? They're soooo cute! Oh my goodness! Nothing could mess up our expectations of these little ones, right? Hmmm. 3am begins to get old, and you never did factor in that it really doesn't matter that you need sleep, too. I remember listening to Bill Cosby years ago, do a skit on having a new baby. When the baby first arrives everyone wants to change the poopy diapers. "Oh would you look at the little poo-poo! Did you make a poo-poo. Choochiecoo. " A couple months down the road it looks more like this. "Oh Man! Again! EWWW!!! Could someone else do this?" You get the picture.

Yesterday, I was visiting with my dear friend, Ruth. I'm so beyond grateful for her friendship. Her wisdom runs deep and her faith runs even deeper. Ruth adopted a BEAUTIFUL baby girl from China nearly 2 years ago. Abigail came along to play with Max and Avery (our dogs). As she entered the house the entire energy of the room changed. She is so delightful to watch. Full of joy and enthusiasm for life. The things she says are hilarious. Seriously, being raised with Three teenage boys is rubbing off on her. Good thing these are good boys =) There is just something magical about being around a toddler. Did I mention that Abigail is just about 3? She brings me joy to be around her! Everything is miracle to her! I ran into them later last night at a restaurant and when she saw me she squealed with excitement over seeing me there! Ah, she knows how to melt her Auntie's heart.

The plan for our visit was to catch up. We have been doing our best to work through a Bible study but sometimes we have to put those plans on hold. When you have a three year old you must always be willing to live on the flex plan. Our time together was spent assisting Abigail up and down the playground, helping her water my flowers, and attempting to give answers to all her "why's", as well as give a demonstration on how to operate a "hoop-a-loop". We did manage to have a conversation. We are women after all, right? We are skilled multi-taskers. Although, we are getting a bit more advanced in our years, just a wee-bit and keeping up requires more energy than we used to have.

I have been wrestling with a few different areas that God is developing my heart for possible ministry and needed her counsel on each one. I have BIG plans! And, of course, I can do it all with a newly adopted baby on my hip. Reality check please! Ruth began to lovingly and wisely point out to me that my life is going to change dramatically. Ministry...isn't being a mom a ministry? URgh! My stinky expectations are getting the better of me again! It won't be long before I will have a little one that requires the better part of all my attention running around our home. The reality of it all was literally running around in our my backyard just to illustrate the point she was trying to make.

All the freedoms I have been enjoying for the past 5 years are going to disappear rather quickly. It made me think about this adoption from a different perspective. I hope one from a closer look at reality. Every aspect of my life is going to change. But on more of a heart level...will our child bond with us? Is the risk worth it all?

Fortunately, I believe it is. Following God is always a risky venture. He doesn't take the safe road to avoid trials. He's always ready for an adventure! And He is always ready to fight for those He loves! When we agreed to following Him across the world to rescue one of His beloved's, we agreed to all that it should be, would be, could be and will be. And if He is asking me lay down my desires to step into a ministry right now I will say yes to that, too. It's all in His timing. Being a Mom is a full-time ministry as it is and why would I want anything more! Look at those cuties! They are worth every distraction, tear, late night, missed date with hubby or friend, etc.

Thanks, Ruth!!! I love you, Girl!