I love this. There are arrows pointing either way. I have a choice as to which direction I can go but really there aren't many ways to divert off the grid.
Lately, life feels more like this...
Actually, the name of the region about sums it up. "Lost Creek Wilderness". We may think we have a clear sense of where we are going, we may even be carrying the map with only one direction shown on it. In reality we find ourselves wandering around on a map that looks the one above.
Life has a way of throwing us curve balls. If you look closely at this map you can see several trails that go in a loop. Do you ever feel like you're just going in circles? I do right now. It feels a bit like deja vu. Haven't I been here already? This all looks very familiar to me. Ah, I have been here. Alright, let me get my bearings and then I'll start out on a new trail.
Oh but, isn't that the point? "I'll" start out on a new trail. I've missed something in the times I've been before. God. He's there and he wants to take my hand and show me the path he wants to lead me down.
This season of life has me all over the place searching. I've been knocked around and sidelined a few times. I've been bullied...yes, bullied and have found myself back in highschool. (Scratching my head wondering, "how did this happen?") I've been picked up and wiped off. And I've had a few soft places to land. All of this to show me how little I'm to be in control of. His hand is in all of it, I can see that now. Yes, even the hard places. How else is he going to get my attention? He is wondering where my alliance lies. Will I place my trust in him or will I continue to trust no one but myself? (How well is that working for you, Cris?)
Yesterday I began a study of Jonah. I wasn't looking to study his story. To be honest, I thought I knew what it was about...a man and a big fish. Right? I have seen the Veggie Tales rendition of the story, doesn't that make me an expert? It's only four chapters in the Bible, how much could there be in that book?
I went to search out Beth Moore studies (she keeps me in line with my studies) but I just wasn't feeling any of them this time. Guess it's time to branch out. As I was looking I saw a new study by Pricilla Shirer simply titled "Jonah". Something in me stirred so out of curiosity I went ahead and purchased the video for the first day. I love how God works! I sat in my chair watching this video with tears streaming down my face. Jonah...he's me. I've been called to do some things that seem extremely big and I feel like I don't have the strength to carry out what he wants me to do. So, I've been doing what everyone does when they don't want to face something, they run. Just like Jonah.
I have really good reasons for running. Jonah did too. " The Ninevites? Really, have you seen what those people are up too? They don't deserve your grace, God." Seriously, the thing he wants me to get involved with is no small thing. I often feel like Jonah. How can I be of any help? I lack a good education. Forget about speaking. Heck, I don't feel like I write well either. (Which is the real reason I don't blog much.)
The truth is, I haven't placed enough faith in God to carry out this mission. The Israelites walked out to meet the Philistine army and saw the giant...their strongest warrior, and said,"um, we can't beat that guy. Just look at him! We have no one that even compares to that guy. Bummer, guess we lose." Well, we know what happens. David looked at that big guy and said.."He's so big, I can't miss!" And he didn't. What a powerful victory that day was for the Israelites. Surely, God still brings down giants. Doesn't he still move mountains? How can I miss with God as my commander and chief? These stories aren't there just for little kiddos to hear in their Sunday school classes. They are there to show the mighty hand of God. The deliverer of His people! The strength we need and the power to be his hands and feet here on earth.
That leads me back to my crazy road maps. Going forward, if I'm to have any impact I need to allow him to show which path to travel. Letting him take the lead is vital to success. I know what I need to do but today I'm asking what your Nineveh looks like? Are you running from something that God is leading you to do? There are no small missions. Are you being called to stand up be the mommy you signed up to be? How about supporting your husband even when you don't want to. Are you being called to adopt? To move somewhere else? To go into missions? Change jobs? Are you called to bring food to the homeless? Whatever stirs you, go with it and please don't run!!! Being inside the Big Fish is icky! =) It's time to move out of the stories and start living them!
Bon voyage!
Cris
No comments:
Post a Comment